Nice to meet you. Multi fandom blog because I'm indecisive. Apologies in advance for occasional rants

What if
all women were bigger and stronger than you
and thought they were smarter

What if
women were the ones who started wars

What if
too many of your friends had been raped by women wielding giant dildos
and no K-Y Jelly

What if
the state trooper
who pulled you over on the New Jersey Turnpike
was a woman
and carried a gun

What if
the ability to menstruate
was the prerequisite for most high-paying jobs

What if
your attractiveness to women depended
on the size of your penis

What if
every time women saw you
they’d hoot and make jerking motions with their hands

What if
women were always making jokes
about how ugly penises are
and how bad sperm tastes

What if
you had to explain what’s wrong with your car
to big sweaty women with greasy hands
who stared at your crotch
in a garage where you are surrounded
by posters of naked men with hard-ons

What if
men’s magazines featured cover photos
of 14-year-old boys
with socks
tucked into the front of their jeans
and articles like:
“How to tell if your wife is unfaithful”
or
“What your doctor won’t tell you about your prostate”
or
“The truth about impotence”

What if
the doctor who examined your prostate
was a woman
and called you “Honey”

What if
you had to inhale your boss’s stale cigar breath
as she insisted that sleeping with her
was part of the job

What if
you couldn’t get away because
the company dress code required
you wear shoes
designed to keep you from running

And what if
after all that
women still wanted you
to love them.


For the Men Who Still Don’t Get It, written 20 years ago by Carol Diehl. 

She wrote a post about the history of this poem that is worth reading.

(via cracktacular)

(Source: waxenneat, via assbutt-in-the-garrison)

karenhealey:

kastiakbc:

princehal9000:

winstons-and-enochs:

the guardian imagines what historical figures might look like today. my personal favourite is shakespeare, reincarnated as a shoreditch hipster.

but can you imagine how’d he’d sound a loft party? 
"I’m going to subvert the whole, like, narrative ideal by telling you upfront that these two, like, teenagers are going to fall in love and die, and then do it. So there’s no more hiding in the words. Stark, yeah? And then, I think I’ll hide a sonnet in their big scene together, right? It’ll be subversive, because only, you know, people who are up on sonnets will get it…..what? No, she’s thirteen—a little edgy but that’s art, man. Art.”

i am loving hipster shakespeare A++

This explains so much. Hipster Shakespeare drank too many experimental microbrews one night:"Will, we need this bit done, buddy. We’ve got rehearsal in ten minutes.""Shit, I dunno. Uh. Exit.""Just… "Exit"?""Exit, pursued by a bear.""Will, come on.""I think I left my LUNGS in that bucket, Robbie, okay? Exit, pursued by a bear. It’s surrealism. Man versus wild. Whatever. Get me a Gatorade and a shit ton of Advil, and maybe I can work out what I’m going to do with the statue."
vaginalsalsa:

lots of pressure on Sunny right now
spookyghoulies:

spookyspikeplates:

LETS TALK ABOUT THIS

I SAW HIM OMG

actualodinson:

lo0o0o-db:

why do people think angels are like, beautiful blonde white women with curly hair im pretty sure in the bible angels had to say “be not afraid” because they have like a shitload of eyes and heads and also are on fire or somthing like that

Sounds like…

(via the-hp-fandom)

political-linguaphile:

howtodropoutofschool:

1. Open Culture: Not a large a selection, but high quality texts. If you just want to skim a book to brush up on a course you took in ninth grade, download one of these. I have yet to be disappointed.

2. Book Boon: Provides free…

PETITION TO MAKE ANDREW GARFIELD AND EMMA STONE THE FACECLAIMS FOR HICCUP AND ASTRID 

image

image

HICCUP 

image

image

ASTRID

(Source: ima-hiccup, via probablyalannister)